This was a tough one to write. It triggered some deep waves of emotion…even now. I share this Truth-Poem with you to illustrate the reality of Hope. It exists in you – no matter what your current circumstances.
To say I had a lot of de-tangling to do on the emotional and physical levels is a grand understatement. There were many times I wondered if it was even possible. I’ve cleared a great deal of debris out of my life, but it’s always a work in progress. And I cannot underscore enough the importance of unplugging from society’s results-0riented, lightening-fast-paced dogma. Yeah, we’ll get all our issues cleared up by the end of next month…if not SOONER! I lost track of all the ‘Lucy-holding-the-football-for-Charlie-Brown’ moments I had falling for that load of $%&#.
Relax. Unplug. Start paying attention to who you really are. Give the inner critic the next 15 minutes off. Loving yourself is a decision. You may have to remind yourself of said decision over and over but eventually, it will become more automatic.
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Loading Up on Food, Tamping Down on the Anxiety
There’s no magic finish line. But the good news is, copious amounts of Self-Love and Patience provide both change and necessary and very healthy coping tools.
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There was major Joy in realizing the bullies and other toxic entities were WRONG about me!
Lunch Break
Inside my car
Parked in the far right corner of a lot
No one can see me
My ritual, not to escape, but to survive
The steam from the open bag bathes my senses
I grab. I bite. I repeat.
Chewing is a distraction from my desire
To devour.
My eyes fixed anywhere but on me….on the truth I cannot examine.
Excitement and comfort disappear with the last bite.
The bag gets crumpled and tossed.
I turn the ignition key over – sedated enough
To return to the sadness of my life.

Moving forward. One step at a time…